So as my artificially-induced good will has evaporated, along with the steroid that was producing the effect, I find myself becoming increasingly annoyed with the obliviously self-centered drones who tend to populate grocery stores and public parking lots. Just those two places--I don't tend to notice them everywhere else. In our local Henry's, the efficiently self-centered, get-out-of-my-way powermoms will literally jam their grocery carts into your heels if you don't move out of their way fast enough. Yesterday I came within a fraction of an inch of wheeling around, jerking off my wig (which makes me look deceptively normal), and snarling, with my frightening biker-babe buzz stripe that's all that's left of my hair, "Back off, NOW!"
This is a little fantasy of mine. It gives me great pleasure. And we're getting close to the point where it's actually going to happen, because all my good-will vibes seem to have been used up.
But seriously, these people who think it's all about them are really annoying. Even if I were perfectly healthy, what makes people think it's okay to jam you out of the way with their grocery carts? Or run you down as you cross the parking lot, even though you're the one in the crosswalk and you were there first? These things have all happened to me. The guy who nearly took me out in the parking lot actually did another pass around, I guess to see if he could perhaps get us on the next go-round. After cutting us off the second time, he decided he wanted to wait for a parking spot up ahead, so he parked in back of my car to wait, effectively blocking us from backing out. Watching us hobble our way around his car to get into our own had no effect on him at all, even though it's pretty obvious I don't walk well. He still wouldn't budge, not even when we turned on the engine and started edging out to show our intent.
That time I did get snarling back out of the car and start heading for him, much to the horror of my husband, who was doing the driving. But really, it was just too much. And that apparently did the trick, because the oblivious troll took off indeed. I hadn't even had a chance to pull my scary wigless transformation.
I keep telling people--don't mess with me. I have a brain tumor. I've got nothing to lose here.
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Ha ha! People are totally oblivious! I was at the Costco and 1 man in a cart kept going from side to side - the whole big Costco aisle and he can't pick a side.
After trying to maneuver around him for several minutes, I finally yelled at him and said "MAKE A DECISION, DUDE - PICK A SIDE!" I couldn't help it. I totally startled him and he got a little huffy but I barrelled past him and moved on. A couple coming the other way were laughing and said "thank you".
Not one of my nicer moments, but people, please.
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