teaching imponderables

We get a variety of exhortations from the teaching gurus on high: "Professors should be coaches rather than lecturers." "Students need to be taught life-long learning, not a list of facts." "Lectures are an inefficient means of teaching. Students need hands-on learning." And yet at the same time we are told, "Grade inflation is out of control. Start lowering your grades." And "You will now teach classes with 250 students in them." And my favorite: "We fear instructors are not using Powerpoint effectively in the classroom."

Is it just me, or do these demands seem utterly contradictory? How can you be a "coach" when you've got 250 students--and you've got them for only one hour at a time, three days a week? How can you implement "hands-on learning" in a classroom of that size? Even if we are lucky enough to have "regular"-sized classes of only 45 students (my average seminar size), how is it that we're supposed to both give up lectures and at the same time use more Powerpoint?

And most of all, I struggle with the grades. We're supposed to coach and teach students how to learn for themselves. Then we're supposed to grade them--for what, exactly? Don't grades become utterly subjective and meaningless at that point?

Argh.